Living Diversity

マニラでのソーシャルワークとの出会い記録から、日本のソーシャルワーク×多文化/法的支援、インドで暮らし、働き、旅するカラフルさ、インド&野草ごはん、身体を解すこと、レジリエンス/回復についての試行錯誤を記録したく。 私もあなたも、ゆるく受けいれて生きていけるといいなと祈りながら。

久々に好きな人と瞑想会

コンセントに繋ぐのたとえが印象深かった。

朝に瞑想しないことは、

コンセント繋げずに掃除機をかけること…

あいのこんせんと。

充電せずにむりやり動いていたな…


最近焦ることが多かった。

今日はのんびりめ、肩のツーンとした張りがやわらいだ気が。

微細な身体のびりびりや世界の音がきこえて面白かった!ありがとうございました🥰

 

そういえば最近TTCの見学に。

(なるべく)期待せずに行ってみた。

呼吸だ〜

ラクダのポーズ、とったのは数分なのに太ももの前面が筋肉痛。

 

多分受けるかな?

ちょっと高い?

尊敬するあの人なら

やらない理由ないんじゃない?

いいタイミングで始まるように自然に流れるんじゃない?

と言ってくれそう。

最近(特にパートナーに)怒りっぽい私にも、

あなたの怒りモードなんてレアなものが見られる人はラッキーじゃない?怒るのもかわいいんじゃないすか?

とか言ってくれそうだなー(妄想)

 

流れ

感じていられますように。

🙏

 


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Mimi -many things happen in life,just enjoy the ride

Watched the movie Mimi

Mimi became surrogate of American couple.

When the doctor said that the baby has down syndrome, the couple abandon the child.

Then....

Many things happen!!!

Mimi sometimes get mad but recover and do what she can do...

So strong

 

Hututu song is nice

Life is journey just enjoy the ride

Life is mistery don't try to  figure it out...

It's a new day.

It's a new dawn.

https://www.lyricstranslation.in/2021/07/hututu-lyrics-english-translation.html?m=1

 

Recently I can't stop suddenly crying n attack the partner.

He's not understanding. I'm not too orz.

It's maybe also a journey...😭

 


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ペイント オヤコもカップルもよき友人関係から、かなぁ

『ペイント』pai-int

 

How we, national children choose our own parents is similar to choose the one to marry...

Initially they're totally others/arien.

Make some compromise

Make contract

Make some quarrel

Get used to each other

If not, depart 

What's the difference?

.... Love

Personally I think the more significant point would be economic gap? Children can't earn money initially..

Considering the history women also have been having difficulties in eanring for their own, though.

Also love marriage can be said kind of new. There are / were marriages without love or love AFTER marriage.

(I might need to practice this, love after severe heart break with the partner )

 

Ohhh Aki has the similar idea with me.

 

Saying No in pa-int is our right and also Obligation

 

If you can change your parents?

If you can choose another person's life/ body to live ?

Still maybe I'll choose the same one ...😭

 

P47

People put too much emphasis on "roots"?

Like food traceability.

Is it that important?

To feel safe?

To understand people?

Isn't it more important to know yourself than knowing parents?

Hmm it's not divided.

Roots can be Part of us. But not everything...

 

NCs are well accustomed to be controlled...

Outside families can be miniture of NC ... there are also rules.

 

Guards have enough space to wait NCs to feel better relaxed...

待つ余裕。

 

Jennu liked the phorogram if that pre-foster who don't hide their honest feelings:) 

" We don't really want a child 🤣but we have a personal issue..."

They seem quite interesting.

 

Knowing me but don't show that, just keep an eye on me.... that's not judgement

 

Why people don't want to give birth to (or raise?) their children..?

Too heavy?? 

Need to invest

 

I want parents who are honest to themselves.

That's so true.

I want a partner who is honest.

I want to choose to be honest.

I want a partner with whom I /we can be honest.

 

Is there perfect match?

Of course not ...

So where is the line of compromise?

 

Job Hunt

Marriage Hunt

Children Hunt 

Parents Hunt

Personal relationships are absorbed into economic market...?

 

NCs number is like our ID .. natural sense:) wanna be like that. See the person as they are without outside info.

CV/ history sucks !?🤣

 

They are not prepared...

What is the preparation to be a parent?

If you make preparation, you can be a good parent???

 

Preparation might be an obstacle to see the children as they are...sense of control..

 

 

P104

Does everyone need to look like "the adult"???

 

Human might not want honesty? Honesty is sometimes... Painful.

 

P116

Children would be hurt most heavily by their family... that's why she decided not to make a child.

It would be scary if I would control the personality, sense of value and even the life..of the child... it's so scary...

I really feel

empathy for her....!!

 

Children are not the Subject of the research or experiment. But many parents do researches n experiments to control their children as they want....!?

 

Everyone has their own inner child... everyone!?

 

Parents are unstable n anxious in general...

 

Jennu n other NCs want the true adult who trust n believe the children... They can find what adults can't see..

 

NCs are like gazel.... since childhood they can walk talk think but need support...no experience to live in the outside society??

Similar to the children with disabilities? Living in another country also? New rules. 

 

People see/ understand the others in a sooooo selfish way. Many Ppl mis- understand NCs n NCs don't understand guardians....

We know NOTHING...

PAK was adult children...

It happens...

Knowing people takes time n effort. That's the key of the relationship.

 

As you get old, your face shows your life... wrinkles along with the eyes says how many times you've smiled in your life...

 

A mother also needs to be independent from her child...

 

How is the decent distance?

_you can see the person, but can't talk!?

Hmm I see....

With the partner I wanna talk/make dialogue....am I expecting too much?

 

P180

We are not confident to be your good parents.

What is "parent"?

Do we really need to be your parents? Can we be friends?

 

They are not unprepared... They thought a lot...

Did I prepare well ? .........

=3

Family is complicated

Takes time

 

Strength Nature...is not how well you can but what you won't stop...

 

Be happy in this unreasonable world 

 

It's not just the matter of the ability, it's coincidence …or karma?

 

Knowing reality, expectations to parents/children go down.

Same for work? Partner?

Work can be multiple.

What about the relationship?

Expecting everything to only one relationship is not fair...

 

Taking care of NCs is like one-way love?(片思い)to enjoy?

 

The age of 13-18.. usually children want distance from their parents but NCs want parents....to get out of NC...

 

Jennu... I don't have confidence to make that kind of relationship....hmmmm

I might feel the similar thing?

I'm not confident to have children.

But Hanna was also like that n they created Friendship, Right?

 

P219

Still we have time.

Something might happen.

We don't know so we feel anxious.

At the same time, it's because we don't know why we can get accounted with unexpected things :)

We don't know so we can learn

We don't know so we feel excited

Life is joyful journey to recognize the things that we didn't know.

 

He's so strong to choose to live as an NC...! without painting...

Am I painting? I remove my paintings in front of specific person...

 

 


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すべての経験は…

きっと慶いこと。

感謝できますように。

なんだかこれまでの転職振り返りまとめシートをアップデートしたい気分

かきつくろうー

 

空がきれい

落ち着く人といる

ありがとう


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きみも私も?ちょっと、詩人なの?

このひとデリカシーないなぁとか

高校生かいな、とか

思うこともあるけど、

 

光のふんわりそそぐ写真

それに添えた言葉

を見ていると、

 

やわらかな眼差しを

見習いたくもなる

 


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手のひらに乗っかる

もちもち

 

抹茶の苦味が

小豆の至福を教えけり

否、

苦味もまた至福か

 

海外に行く友達がちらり、ほらり

私もまた呼ばれるのかな

いまは、ひたすら、

ここで

 

もやもやの先…言語化、そして現象に○○をつけること

エッセイストの役割は3以降を書くこと、あるある!を引き出すこと、とな〜

 

1. 何もわかっていない
2. ぼんやりと感じ、もやもやしている
3. 言語化できている
4. その現象に名前をつけている

 

もやもや、よくある

全部言語化できてなくてもいい気もするけど、

書けるときは書いたほうが自分も楽で、

他の人にも分かち合えるかも、なのかなぁ。

 

名前をつける、一般化する

ラベル付けのよしあしはあるけど

自分なりに名づけてみるのはすき

当事者研究の自己病名つけるみたいな。

 

そのもやもやさんに、

名前をつけるならなんだろう?

 

 

ゆるりとゆこう。

 

生きる力となる言葉の力とは?

www.jstage.jst.go.jp/article/jasbel/1/0/1_84/_pdf/

 

夜間中学の基本生活漢字381文字損亭の背景とその指導

 

学力とは…
学ぶことによって身についた生きる力


生きる力。


生きる力となる国語力とは…
なかなか具現化に悩んだらしい
そうよね、悩むよね…
そのプロセスも気になる


そして定まったのが
1)自分の考えを相手に分かるように話す力
2)主語述語の整った3行以上の文章がかける力(メモやはがき)
3)生活に欠かせない基本的な漢字を読んだり書いたりできる力
4)人生をいかに生きるかを考えるのに役立つ文学作品を一作以上読む力


国語力、なんだけど、
外国語の目標にもつなげられそう。
中国語でパートナーに怒れるようになりたい笑
よく怒ってるドラマ見るからそこからまねしようかな。
メモはがき、まだまだ書ける気がしないやー
文学作品を読める、たしかにいいな。昔話は読んだけど。
生活の中の語彙は少しずつ増えてきたかなぁ。
ヒンディー何文字かけるのかな私は。やってみようと思いながらやってないやー


暗唱できるまで根気よく読む。
そこから、書写。
まだあんまり読んでないかも?私。
聞いてばかり。
速さ、条件反射的に言えるの大切。激励しながら学んでるらしい。わお。
シャドーイング、よみよみゆるりがんばろう😊
最近10分でも勉強してる、よきかんじだ。
癒やされる5月になりますよう。
4月たいへんやった〜お疲れさま〜